How unexpected. Walking into my boss's office after completing these last 9 mos of work to fill out my paperwork for achieving my CCC's (certification of clinical competence) and reviewing with her my experience was suppose to be a brief affair. I knew that she had made commentary in the past about increasing my pay once I achieved my c's, but I really had not thought it would be discussed during the paperwork process. For these last few months, I've really had to sit back and assess this job situation. It caused alot of emotional distress ranging from trepidation to sheer infuriation, sprinkled with frustration, confusion, and irritation all because the word of my boss had not been fulfilled or my points were muddled with her weak ability to take things in. I've been stressed and I've cried and I've grown. I've become stronger in my business mind, people managing, and organizational skills. I've developed an instinct about patients (since I've had no real supervision or direction), and I have intensified my skills to achieve some progress (no matter what the diagnosis). So overall, there has been some really bad bad that I feel has hindered me; but there has also been some good good that makes me feel that I have made some unique areas of growth. I, of course, have had to really look through all that shade my boss was sending my way to find the sunshine that is this job, but that's how the real world works I guess. I think if my boss wasn't who she was, my job would be much more pleasurable. In truth, it's really not a bad gig. I manage my own schedule; take time off when I want; see who I want to see (patient wise) {for the most part}; have complete autonomy with decisions I make; and I get to move around from place to place throughout my day rather than being locked up in a building the whole day. I mean, the mild drawbacks {a ridiculous amount of paperwork that spills over into my personal time on a daily basis, waiting for reimbursement of supplies I have to purchase, and the challenge of setting up the next week of therapy sessions by calling parents or patients} aren't really significant enough to make me feel as bothered as I have been with the topping of my boss. Ugh... Well, anyway. I had planned in my mind to leave her after I received my certification confirmation and going into traveling therapy where you get 13wk assignments wherever in the country and have housing provided with additional negotiable perks like grocery stipend, car stipend, or whatever else you could think of stipend while still getting an hourly rate. A pretty lucrative job option that offers me the opportunity to see the country without paying a cent. This, of course, would cause some shifting away from my significant (not my favorite thing), but it would make my father pretty happy... *rolling of eyes*. I was settled on making that decision- until, I sat down to do my paperwork with my boss. This woman offered me a raise (a given), and threw out the number. Now, I really didn't think it would be much of anything because I have only been working with her for 9 mos and she has been known to make commentary about me (negatively) to other people (all the while telling me to my face how amazing I am *smh*). Of course, she talks ish about everybody, so I'm not offended... It just is what it is. But when this woman told me she wanted to give me a $13,000 raise- *stop* - that's right people, one, three, zero, zero, zero raise; I was beside myself. Literally.... I had an out of body experience and I was sitting beside myself. It's definitely making me rethink my departure. Mostly because I know what I would be getting myself into; she's not obligating me to stay there for any length of time (so if it was just too miserable for words, I could leave); I would be staying near my significant; and staying at any given job for 2+ yrs looks good on a resume. I'm processing my thoughts through this, but I will say that I'm fully thrown and needed to write this out.... What am I gonna do? *sigh, smh*
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